Explaining Death To Little Ones

As you may remember, my father-in-law was diagnosed with ALS (Lou Gehrig's Disease) in August of 2010. He passed away on December 2 of this year. This picture of him and Goose in their overalls was taken in September, just before his health really started to decline.

Blessedly, his death was quite peaceful. I used the concepts from the book What Happened When Grandma Died to explain things to Goose, though I didn't read the book to her because she is quite literal right now and I think she would have been confused trying to make the switch between Grandma in the book and Grandpa in our life.

It basically says that when we die, we leave three old things behind and get three new corresponding things: our body, our home, and our work. The book goes into much more detail, of course, but it provided for much discussion and an opportunity for Goose to ask many (MANY!) questions. I'll admit I had some trouble being patient answering the same thing over and over (AND OVER!), but once I realized it was her way of processing things, that helped. And it also warmed my hear to hear her explain to her 2YO cousin where Grandpa is. (in heaven, and also in our hearts)

I know that many of you have been praying for us, and I can't tell you what that means to me. I hope you have had a very blessed Christmas and I wish you all the best in 2012! (better get used to writing that now...) I'll be back in a bit with my Handmade Christmas 2011 post, which I meant to get up a long time ago, but better late than never.

No Sew Lace Rosary Roses

I'm sure there are plenty of ideas for this sort of thing around the 'net, so what's one more? This idea was inspired by this post by Kimberlee at Pondered in My Heart. I am not too in practice with my crochet hook these days, so I decided to do a no-sew version with lace, flannel, and hot glue.






I made up a leaf pattern and traced it onto flannel, then cut them out. I made 13, ten for Hail Marys, one for Our Father, one for Glory Be, and one for the Fatima prayer.








Using scraps of mostly thrifted lace, I just cut them to similar sizes and then rolled them up starting at one end.








With the hopes that the flower would not be pulled loose, I used quite a bit of hot glue and pushed the bottom of the lace rose in it. I then went back and put a dab of hot glue on to hold the edge of the lace on the outside.







Goose and I gave it a trial run this morning, and I was pleased with the outcome. It is my hope that we can incorporate some prayer together during Lent, and perhaps it will be a habit to continue on afterwards.




See lots more ideas for Lent for little people at Catholic Icing and see what everybody else is making here:

The Way of the Cross

One of the things I love about Lent is attending Stations of the Cross. Don't get me wrong - walking the path toward Jesus' death with Him is excruciating. And yet I look forward to it every week. I usually cry, and I've finally gotten to the point where I don't get too embarassed about it. I'm blessed that Goose LOVES anything to do with church and Jesus, though admittedly she wasn't quite sure what was going on at first since it's different from Mass. I'm also blessed that it is available just down the street from me - there were only six of us in attendance this week, but it was as powerful as if there had been a packed house.

If you'd like to learn more about Stations, here are a few links from Creighton University in Omaha. They explain why do the Stations, how to do the Stations, and provide online Stations that one can click through.

Stations of the Cross are an excellent way to help keep focus on Jesus as we prepare to celebrate His resurrection. Even if you are not Catholic, I highly encourage you to check them out, and join Him on his journey toward your salvation - and mine.

Friday Night "Fun"

I knew something was up when the Honker didn't eat much lunch. That in of itself isn't terribly unusual, except that it included some much-loved tortilla. And she asked for "bedtime" - though she did that a week ago, so it wasn't without entirely precedent either. I gave her a bit of Tylenol and put her down for a nap. She was up about an hour and a half later with a nasty, nasty diaper, and once cleaned up, she asked to lay back down. She slept for around another hour after that, and seemed to have better energy.

Until she wanted "Mama hold you". We cuddled for a while, and I could hear her tummy gurgling. Should have been my first clue, eh? I asked her if she needed to go potty a couple of times, and she kept telling me no. Then she sat up and hurked on me. I guess it surprised me enough that I kind of froze, instead of taking her over to the sink that was just a few feet away. Multiple hurks later, I shook myself out of the daze and we both hopped in the tub, which I think she found hilarious. I left her in there to play while I worked on cleaning the (carpeted) kitchen floor and (upholstered) kitchen chair, and started a load of laundry with our icky, icky clothes.

I just finished cleaning the floor when I heard her cry from the bathroom (it's right off the kitchen, so I felt reasonably OK leaving her - usually I do stay with her while she's in the tub, though). She'd gotten sick again. So, I put her on the potty in case she wasn't done, and started draining the tub and pulling her toys to clean. Thankfully there were no "emergencies" after that, though I kept her in a diaper the rest of the afternoon and evening and she was able to tell me once that she needed to go potty.

Keep in mind that I've been a deal nut for a while... About the tenth time I walked through the kitchen and sighed because I can still smell something yucky, I remembered that I bought a carpet shampooer a while back and it was still in the box downstairs. So, with a little help from Hubs (whom I had to awaken at 8:30PM, another sigh), I got it assembled and running. Let's hope I don't wake up tomorrow to any more icky smells!

Actually, I'm kind of hoping that I don't wake up in the middle of the night to a crying Goose and a mess to clean up, but as she's grown and evolved as a person, I've grown and evolved as a mother right along side her. Two years ago, I would have been nearly paralyzed at the thought of dealing with a sick child during the night. (It didn't help that I was consistently only getting about four to six hours of sleep during a 24 hour period.)

I'll admit it's hard knowing I am no longer able to comfort Goose by nursing her to sleep. However I know now that if she's up during the night, once her need is met, she'll go back to sleep. I know now that even if I have to get up with her multiple times during the night, God will give me the graces to deal with tomorrow on a lack of sleep, to clean up messes, to snuggle a cranky toddler, to do whatever it is that I need to do to fulfill the vocation of motherhood to which He has called me. I'm thankful that I can count on Hubs to help me out, even if it's just to snuggle Goose during the night while I am cleaning up messes. (Or during his pre-bedtime nap, if I need help with carpet shampooer assembly.)

For sure, things are put into perspective when I consider the struggles of people in Haiti right now, and many other parts of the world where day-to-day living is a struggle in of itself. If you'd like to join me in a good cry, watch this video from ABC. I don't know this couple myself, but they went to the same Nebraska college as a high school friend of mine. As a mother, I can scarcely begin to imagine what it was like for Mandy and Matt, not knowing if their nearly adopted daughter was hurt or even alive.

So, like everyone else, I will be including the victims of the earthquake in my prayers, and snuggling my little one just a bit tighter.

Merry Christmas!

"Hail, and blessed be the hour and the moment in which the Son of God was born of the most pure Virgin Mary, at midnight, in Bethlehem, in piercing cold. In that hour, vouchsafe O my God, to hear my prayers and grant my desires, through the merits of our Savior, Jesus Christ, and His Blessed Mother, Amen."

--St. Andrew Novena

I wish all of you a very Merry Christmas and many blessings in the coming year!

(image credit)

One of Those Days . . .

Today is "one of those days" where things aren't quite going my way, and although I'm able to recognize that it's *me* that is the problem, that doesn't seem to help all that much. :>) I finally took a minute to open the e-mail I get every weekday from Word of God and it was awesome enough to raise goosebumps and make me write this post immediately.
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God is our refuge and strength. (Psalm 46:1)

O Lord, support us all the day long,
until the shadows lengthen, and the evening comes,
and the busy world is hushed,
and the fever of life is over, and our work is done.
Then, in your mercy, grant us a safe lodging
and a holy rest, and peace at the last.

Ven. John Henry Newman, 19th century
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Yup, my day is looking up already. Thanks, God! If you'd like to sign up to receive these e-mails, you can click the link above.

Frugal Advent Wreath

Friends, I will try to get a better picture of my Advent wreath. But I really wanted to get this post written and published before Advent is over! :>) Here's how I made it on the cheap, nine years ago:

Go to your local craft store (mine happened to be Hobby Lobby) when they are offering Christmas garland on sale. Purchase a 9' piece that you like. You may be able to tell that mine has berries and silver and gold eucalyptis. Also purchase nine purple candles and three pink ones. Tapers happened to be on sale, many people prefer pillar candles that will last the entire season - your call.

Oddly enough (you may have noticed), taper HOLDERS were not on sale at the time, so I bought votive ones and use a piece of fun-tak (ticky-tak, whatever you call it) to hold them in place. Works great - and this should be out of the reach of little ones anyway.

Optionally, you may also include a white candle, which I place in the middle, not only because the holder does not match the others. :>) It is lit on Christmas and represents Jesus. Jessica has some neat ideas on Advent overall, but I especially like the idea of draping the white candle in blue, which represents Mary. (Scroll to Dec 7 and 8.)

Hack the garland into three more or less equal pieces, and twist the ends together to form a circle. I just bent one end over the other on mine and it's held (quite well) though you may wish to use a piece of wire or something to keep the ends together, depending on your garland.

So, now you have three Advent wreaths, one for your home and two that you can use to bless others. When I gave them as Christmas presents to two friends nine years ago, I also included a booklet with Advent devotions. But that was when I lived near a Catholic store. :>)

Blessings to you this Advent season of preparation - and for more frugal ideas, visit Life As Mom. This is also linked to Proverbs 31 Living's Handmade Christmas.

About Me, Part 3

So during part 2, I related that I had moved to Colorado Springs to coordinate a mission located in Hermosillo, Sonora, Mexico. I managed to do OK at my job. The first several times I had to speak at churches were pretty nerve-wracking (I won't even tell you what I blurted out by accident at the first one), but I soon got more comfortable with my speech, myself, and my job and had a lot of fun meeting people and visiting beautiful places. (Also, I had no idea that so many people slept during the sermon at church. You hear about it, but it's a much different thing to see it from the front!)

One of my favorite visits was to Leadville, Colorado. On the twisty, windy drive there, I endured road construction and people in RVs with no agenda and certainly not my sense of urgency. About halfway into my trip, I realized I was NOT going to make it on time. I left a message for the priest, and got there as soon as I could, "sneaking" into the front row once I made it. (Yeah, try doing THAT sometime.) The Gospel reading was on Mary and Martha (Luke 10:39-42). I tossed parts of my carefully-written speech out the proverbial window, and spoke about how I really had Martha's heart that day. I then connected it back with the missioners' work and how they helped me see countless ways to be more like Mary - and it ended up being one of my best talks ever.

Then came September 10, 2001. I don't remember where I was when I received the call; I don't even remember all of the details now. Two of our missioners were in a car accident while attending a funeral. Miraculously, no one else was hurt aside from bumps and bruises, but for a bit, we weren't sure how badly our ladies were injured. I woke up the morning of September 11th with my bags packed, intending to get a plane ticket and travel to Hermosillo as soon as possible. As I was getting ready for work, the morning radio show indicated that something weird had happened in New York. The news kept getting worse and worse with regards to travel and more importantly, with regards to what was happening to our country. I spent many hours over the next several days with our travel agent, but there wasn't anything she could do. We finally put the adult son of one of the missioners on a bus so he could be with his mother.

It seems like forever now, but I think it was sometime within the next day or two that we learned one missioner ruptured her spleen, and after surgery and receiving blood donated by a parishioner, she was stable. The other missioner broke her collarbone and a few teeth. Once air restrictions were lifted, one of my bosses flew down to help sort things out.

I have never felt so inadequate, so unqualified, so ineffective as I did during that time. My seven years of high school and college Spanish didn't go far at all while talking on the phone to hospital staff. I didn't know how to deal with pretty much anything that had happened, let alone help the missioners. Plus there were so many things going on in our country at that time - I remember waking up in the middle of the night and hearing the National Guard planes patrolling the city while the flight ban was still in place. I didn't know at the time that it was the good guys and I was *terrified*.

The two injured missioners returned home, and I did some this-and-that stuff to help them re-acclimate to life here and recuperate from their injuries. I actually managed to recruit one missioner to serve, but with only him and one other female missioner there, the dangers of our neighborhood really began to surface. Again, I don't remember the specifics, but I seem to remember they had some close calls with people trying to break in, likely high on drugs. Around Christmastime, it became clear that it was no longer safe for them to remain in Hermosillo.

Personally, I was so shaken by my inability to perform my job after the accident, I decided it was time for me to move on. I was homesick, and tired of living in a "big city" where I didn't know very many people. (Though I was part of a very wonderful young adults group there . . . I think they are now called Gravity, since they are "grounded in Christ" - very cool!)

Anyway. I found a job about an hour from my hometown back in Nebraska and jumped at the chance to go back home. The teaser for next time - at this point, I was six months away from meeting a certain handsome Lutheran cow farmer. Stay tuned! :>)

Also, please leave a comment - where were you when you learned what was happening on September 11, 2001? How did it affect you?

Prayerful Beads

I'd like to introduce you to a blog that houses a very beautiful ministry - actually an apostolate - called Prayerful Beads. I bought two rosaries for two of my nieces and one for Goose several months ago and couldn't have been more pleased with them. (Click on those links to learn more about them.)

The ones I purchased are pictured above - please note that they are the pictures that Barbara took to post on her blog, I'm not that good of a photographer! :>) She gave me permission to post them here, which is wonderful because the two for my nieces were quickly passed along (much to their delight). Barbara's prices are noted in the descriptions, and she can create nearly anything that a person is looking to find. She also repairs rosaries, which I'm sure is quite a blessing to those needing that service.

If you're looking for a very high quality rosary at an affordable price, I encourage you to visit Prayerful Beads. And thank you to Barbara for your apostolate - I'm sure that God will richly bless you and your work!

On To The End

I woke up a bit anxious this morning as I had dreamed that Hubs was gone. This doesn't happen often, but enough that I know the anxiety can permeate my entire day if I let it. I have found the best way to rid myself of it is prayer. It's amazing how I can physically feel my nervousness lifting as God removes it.

As a quick aside, I am constantly evaluating how much time I spend online and usually deciding that it is way too much, but don't do anything about it. Kim has written an excellent post here after a week-long sabbatical from being online. Much food for thought.

Back to prayer. My college years were also filled with anxiety. I attended church frequently and stayed close to God in general, but I didn't lay things at His feet the way I do now. He reminded me to turn to Him in interesting ways, though. One summer, I spent a month studying in Mexico, and on either side of that trip, I worked for a State of Nebraska employee in a very bizarre internship. I compiled a few reports for him, but spent most of my time assisting his wife, who ran a Kumon Math Institute. There was a large poster in the bathroom of that office building with these words:

On To The End

Do not be disconcerted by the fits of vexation and uneasiness which are sometimes produced by the multiplicity of your worries. No, indeed, dearest child, all these are but opportunities of strengthening yourself in the loving forbearing graces which our Lord sets before us.

Be patient with everyone, but above all, with yourself. I mean, do not be disturbed because of your imperfections and always rise bravely from a fall. I am glad that you make a daily new beginning; there is no better means of progress in the spiritual life than to be continually beginning afresh, and never to think we have done enough.

Go on in all simplicity; do not be so anxious to win a quiet mind, and it will be all the quieter. Do not examine so closely into the progress of your soul. Do not crave so much to be perfect, but let your spiritual life be formed by your duties – and by the actions which are called forth by circumstances. Do not take over much thought for tomorrow. God Who has led you safely on so far, will lead you on to the end.

St. Frances de Sales

I have returned to these words that I scrawled in a notebook so many years ago time and time again. I'm amazed at how frequently I take away something different that I never noticed before. Today it was this part: "let your spiritual life be formed by your duties – and by the actions which are called forth by circumstances." God knows my circumstances, and he knows my weaknesses and limitations. His grace is enough to sustain me, though. And for that, I give thanks!

Learn more about St. Francis de Sales here, and the image and more info can be found here.

(PS - I think I'm going to link this up to Gratituesday tomorrow.)

Uniting Our Suffering with That of Christ

Our priest told a very moving story at Mass this weekend - it was a first-hand account told at a retreat he attended many years ago, by a priest from Washington D.C. This priest had a brother that was not active in the faith, and the priest had said many prayers on his brother's behalf.

There was a young boy in his parish that was dying of cancer, and when his hour was near, the priest was called in. The priest assured the boy of his prayers, and made a request of the lad. He asked the boy to pray for his brother, knowing that when we unite our sufferings with those of Christ, they are made perfect, because Christ is perfect.

Sadly, the boy slipped into a coma that evening and died. What happened the next morning was not known to the priest for about a week, but it surely shows the work of the Holy Spirit. His brother was awakend at about 6 o'clock in the morning, just several hours after the boy's death. He managed to hold off until about 7 AM, at which time he knocked on the door of the nearest rectory where he was welcomed by a sleepy-eyed priest. He made a good confession and rejoined the church.

Better yet, when our priest returned to his parish after this retreat and told this story, after Mass he was approached in the sacristy by a man. He thought Father must have told that story just for him as the circumstances were quite similar. He hadn't been very faithful up to that point, but afterwards, he and his family rejoined the church as well.

Come Holy Spirit, and fill the hearts of your faithful, and kindle in them the fire of Your Divine Love. Send forth Your Spirit and they shall be created, and You shall renew the face of the earth. Oh God, Who by the light of the Holy Spirit instructed the hearts of the faithful, Grant, that by the same Spirit we may be truly wise and ever rejoice in His consolation. We ask this through Christ Our Lord. Amen.

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This link has a number of Scripture references to suffering.
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Fr. Mike Manning says:

St. Paul gives us an insight into this when we wrote in his letter to the Colossians, "I am now rejoicing in my sufferings for your sake, and in my flesh I am completing what is lacking in Christ's afflictions for the sake of his body, that is, the Church." Colossians 1.24 That means that Christ is relying on us to be part of his suffering and cross. He values our suffering. Read the whole thing here.

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The Catechism of the Catholic Church says in paragraphs 2014 and 2015:

Spiritual progress tends toward ever more intimate union with Christ. This union is called "mystical" because it participates in the mystery of Christ through the sacraments - "the holy mysteries" - and, in him, in the mystery of the Holy Trinity. God calls us all to this intimate union with him, even if the special graces or extraordinary signs of this mystical life are granted only to some for the sake of manifesting the gratuitous gift given to all.

The way of perfection passes by way of the Cross. There is no holiness without renunciation and spiritual battle. (68) Spiritual progress entails the ascesis and mortification that gradually lead to living in the peace and joy of the Beatitudes:

He who climbs never stops going from beginning to beginning, through beginnings that have no end. He never stops desiring what he already knows. (69)

68 - Cf. 2 Tim 4
69 - St. Gregory of Nyssa, Hom. in Cant. 8:PG 44, 941C.
Also see paragraphs 774, 407, 2725, and 1438

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Brian Pizzalato says "So, why do people suffer? Suffering can be a result of sin. Of this there is no doubt. Suffering can also serve as a way of testing and purification." Read more of his good stuff here.
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Agape Bible Study has an article on How Should The Christian Respond to Personal Suffering? The verse at the top of the article is 2 Corinthians 12:9, "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness." I have more than my share of weaknesses, for sure.
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While I was visiting the mission in Mexico, I saw a lot of suffering. I saw people living in conditions that were a hundred times worse than the garage where I parked my car - and smaller, to boot. I saw them sharing a piece of Christ's suffering on a daily basis. I learned a great deal about our call to holiness.
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Come, Holy Spirit!

Image found at Web Gallery of Art.

Pentecost Novena to the Holy Spirit

Jen at Conversion Diary had a post yesterday linking to this novena to the Holy Spirit that leads up to Pentecost.

From the EWTN link:
The novena in honor of the Holy Spirit is the oldest of all novenas since it was first made at the direction of Our Lord Himself when He sent His apostles back to Jerusalem to await the coming of the Holy Spirit on the first Pentecost. It is still the only novena officially prescribed by the Church. Addressed to the Third Person of the Blessed Trinity, it is a powerful plea for the light and strength and love so sorely needed by every Christian.

And who doesn't need more of the Holy Spirit in their life? I started mine at breakfast this morning - won't you join me?